Use S-V-O and write stronger sentences.

If you are learning to write English as a second language (or know the language and just want to write it better), pay attention to sentence patterns and you will write with more clarity.

English sentences rely heavily on the Subject-Verb-Object pattern. Look at any newspaper on any day and you'll see the pattern at work: "Obama asks for trillions", "Republicans want concessions", "A-Rod admits steroid use", and so on. Those that deviate from this pattern risk losing clarity.

Look at how pattern dictates meaning. If you change the position of the words, "Dog" and "Man" in the following sentence, you change the meaning completely: "Dog bites man" becomes "Man bites dog", same words but certainly different meanings, although the pattern remains the same. This isn't true for all languages.

We talked yesterday about Latin. Let me invite you into this beautiful language again, this time with the Christian prayer, "Our Father." This well known prayer reads as follows in Latin:

"Pater noster, qui es in caelis: sanctificetur nomen tuum: adveniat regnum tuum: fiat voluntas tua, sicut in caelo et in terra. Panem nostrum quotidianum da nobis hodie: et dimitte nobis debita nostra, sicut et nos dimittimus debitoribus nostris. Et ne nos inducas in tentationem. Sed libera nos a malo."

"Pater" means "father", of course (ala "paternalism"). We all get that. And, as we said in the last post, "caelis" means "heaven." You may guess that "nomen" means name, especially if you know the prayer, that is, "Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name." Now, look at the next part of the prayer, "adveniat regnum tuam." You may surmise that "regnum" has to do with "kingdom" (as in "regal") and you'd be right. But, it's the pattern of the language that's telling.

Latin depends, not on pattern and word placement, but on case endings. If you translate "adveniat regnum tuum" to English, it reads, "comes kingdom your." If you want to know the meaning, you need to know the case endings. Not true in English. You need only understand the patterns, and the power of the verbs. If you use the Subject-Verb-Object pattern and also keep the subject and verb close together, you will write solid, easy-to-understand sentences.

Those of you who use a language that depends on case endings, watch for sentence patterns in English. And, those of you who write English as your first language, use the sentence pattern S-V-O to write stronger sentences.

Attend a Latin mass, if you can find one, and learn about your language.

I attend Roman Catholic mass with the Pittsburgh Latin Mass Community at St. Boniface Church on the North Side in Pittsburgh. I do this because I grew up with the Latin mass and because I am captivated by its beauty and solemnity. And, a little know fact among my friends and acquaintances, I studied Latin in high school; in fact, I took Latin One twice! (Ida Ficker, my Latin teacher, thought I needed to review the fundamentals after my first, literally sophomoric, attempt.)

In any event, I advise you to attend a Latin mass, if you can find one, regardless of your religious preferences. You will find the splendor and mystery of this mass exhilarating. If you follow the mass booklet closely you will learn much about the English language. And, if you attend to the proceedings, you will learn that communication involves more than just words.

For instance, the mass begins with the Asperges (the sprinkling of water) and asks, "Misere mei, Deus" or, "Have Mercy on me God." If you know English and never took a day of Latin class, you will be able to translate that sentence. Or this passage, "...omnipotens aeterne Deus et mittere digneris sanctum Angelum tuum de caelis." Do you have it? You've got the "Deus," right? How about the "aeterne"? (eternal) and the "omnipotens" (all powerful)? This isn't so hard, right?

Our language has borrowed mightily from the Latin. If you know the word "celestial" you will have found the clue to "caelis" in the passge above. If you know "saint", you will know "sanctum" which in this case is "holy"; after all, saints are holy! And, who could have missed "Angelum"? If you named your daughter "Angela", you know you really named her "angel".

If you have a chance to sit in that high vaulted church on the North Side and listen to the choir singing in Latin and breathe the fragrant incense while watching the ministrations of the 14 altar boys dressed in black and white (sorry, no girls in this mass) to the learned and pious Fr. Myers, clothed in colorful garments, you will be transported to a world of spirit. The ritual, symbolism and colors of the mass clothe you in an almost overwhelming spiritual experience. You understand the mystery of the cross without a verbatim translation. That, my friends, is communication!

Fr. Myers recites the entire one-hour mass in Latin, including the readings (which he later translates before his homily). If you listen closely you will hear him say, "Confiteor Deo omnipotenti, beatae Mariae semper Virgini, beato Michaeli Archangelo, beato Joanni Baptistae, sanctis Apostolis Petro et Paulo, omnibus Sanctis, et vobis fratres, quia peccavi nimis cogitatione verbo, et opere: (the priest strikes his breast three times) mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa. Ideo precor beatam Mariam semper Virginem, beatum Michaelem Archangelum, beatum Joannem Baptistam, sanctos Apostolos Petrum et Paulum, omnes Sanctos, et vos fratres, orare pro me ad Dominum Deum nostrum."

Can I translate that easily with my two years of Latin One? No. But I am learning to. I know that the priest is talking about "blessed" ("beatae") people and "confession" ("Confiteor") and "sin" ("peccavi") and "words" ("verbo") and "my fault" ("mea culpa"). And, as I enjoy this mysterious and beautiful experience, I find the keys to unlocking the English vocabulary. But, again, you need not sit there and translate. You will get the message.

A communication involves messages being send back and forth through media by senders and receivers who typically have different agendas and dispositions. To share a common reality they struggle for many reasons, not the least of which is noise, clutter, distractions. If you attend the Latin mass, you will not share a common language, but you will share a message, subtle perhaps, that matters of the spirit are profound and mysterious, that they penetrate beyond language.

Connect with your customers, and stay connected, through writing.

How do you connect with your customers? Call them? Meet them face-to-face? Send them a piece of sales literature, a link to your website, an RFP? Or, do you meet them through a mutual business associate?

Whatever the means, chances are great that somewhere along the line you will use the written word to connect to your customers and, just as importantly, stay connected to them. After all, writing is inexpensive way to maintain a connection. A stamp costs, what, 41 cents and an e-mail is free!

If you’re using writing to connect or stay connected to your customers, you’ll want to be certain that what you are writing is well written. What does “well written” mean? It means that you clearly understand your purpose and your audience. It means that you write messages that are written with clarity and coherence and easy-to-read design features. It also means that you write messages in the active voice, using action verbs and characters as subjects, as well as short words, short sentences and short paragraphs.

These recommendations for well written documents apply to any form of written communication – letters, memos, e-mails, RFP’s, and even hand-written notes, as well as social media, such as blogs, white papers and writings on social applications such as Facebook, MySpace, Friendster, Orkut, and so on.

What, you say? I can connect to my customers with writings on social applications? Yes, absolutely yes! What do you write about, for instance, on your blog? You write only about that which will interest your customers and potential customers. And, what interests them? Typically, they want to read about business trends, technology trends, business stories, current events, FAQ’s, “Top 10” lists, interviews, book reviews, business problems and solutions, and the like.

If you don’t want to blog because you can’t spare the time (and if you blog you know you must write regularly and respond regularly), try writing a “white paper.” White papers typically focus on business stories, especially business problems and solutions. In other words, they discuss that which interests the audience. Just as a blog cannot be a personal or corporate rant, a white paper cannot be used to overtly further some corporate sales objective. If you use these media to write about how great you and your company are, eventually you will be found out and no one will read your papers, white, brown, green, red or blue.

When you use writing to connect to your customers, you are attempting to engage them in an on-going conversation, a dialogue, wherein you can learn their interests and their issues (their pain) and help them figure out solutions to their problems. Then, as you communicate with each other, you slowly and subtly grow your relationship, one which is based on mutual understanding, trust and, competence. You will find that your written communications will tell the story of your growing business relationship and support the other channel activities that you use to keep your relationship strong, that is, face-to-face meetings, telephone calls, IM’s, tweets, reports, RFP’s, Steeler games and cocktails at Happy Hour!

Ever send an e-mail to the wrong person?

Some of you know how this goes: You send a nasty e-mail, feeling quite emotional and righteous. Then you realize with that sinking feeling that you hit the send button without checking the addressees and sent it to the person you were criticizing. Or, the subject of your wrath sends it back to you (with equally righteous comments) because you didn't know, until that frightful moment, that you had f***ed up.

Woe and alas. This is e-mail, my friends. Can't live with it; can't shoot it. Gotta check and double-check those "To" and "cc" windows. I know this because I have sent the wrong messages to the wrong people. And now today, I had the dis-pleasure of having an e-mail about me (but not intended for me) come via a business partner who first received the errant message. We were to meet with a potential business alliance from out of town and a third party from Pittsburgh was helping to make the arrangements. This person accused my partner and me in an e-mail to the out of town person of everything but the Jimmy Hoffa murder, then mistakenly sent it to my partner, who quickly forwarded it to me.

We immediately angered and then just as quickly laughed. We hardly know this individual and we won't lose any long-standing friendship or deep business relationship as a result of this. However, we now know much more about the real person, someone who has a nasty passive/aggressive streak.

So, what to do? My partner and I discussed our response and decided that he should write back since he received the wayward message. In his measured response, he questioned the business relationship and rightfully so. It's too bad because what happened ultimately costs all of us.

Lesson learned? Well, people don't communicate well. The warden was right: "What we have here is a failure to communicate." The message sender had obvious problems with us and didn't tell us about them. This person's message could have been better delivered in a face-to-face meeting. Or, even an e-mail with a more direct message to us would have helped. But, a rant about us to the out-of-town person didn't help anyone. Or, this person could have written a vitriolic message, full of steam and vinegar, and then never sent it.

Remember this: E-mail works best when it carries facts. It does not work in any emotional context. It lacks context cues and cannot build rapport, especially when you send it to someone you just finished insulting. So, never respond in anger; you'll regret it later.

Avoid sexism, you guys!

Prejudice affects both men and women. However, sexism as a form of prejudice in our language discriminates more against women than men. This problem has historical and political roots. You need not be told that for years women were kept out of certain occupations and roles. Today, however, we find women in the police force, the postal service and the infantry, among other previously male-dominated professions. For this reason, we need to use a vocabulary that reflects the important role women play in society.

Over the years our language has, unfortunately, relied on words such as these: policeman, infantryman, chairman, postman, fisherman, guys, and the like. People who use these terms are considered not just sexist but unfair, insensitive, uninformed and archaic. Obviously, we are best served to understand how words like these show prejudice against others and to avoid using them.

Consider the following list and ask yourself if the words are sexist: Mankind, Modern Man, Brotherhood of Man, Forefathers, Housewife, Poetess, Old Maid, and Working Man. It doesn’t require much thinking to know that these words reveal sexist thinking. Sometimes, however, sexist references are more subtle. Look at these sentences:

Each man should be sure that his secretary does her work well.
He studies to be a male nurse.
Last week the city fathers voted to close saloons on Sunday.
Our Constitution tells us that all men are created equal.
God has promised his people a place in Heaven.

Much sexist writing is subtle. An “aggressive man” is not typically considered a negative comment; however, the term “aggressive woman” is often pejorative. Imagine a scenario where a visitor to an architectural firm tells the woman he first meets that he wants to speak to an architect. Keep in mind that not all women and in architectural firms are secretaries (and not all nurses are women). Indeed, if you are sensitive to this issue, you will easily be able to answer this riddle: How could the baseball game have had a score of 5-3 when not a man reached first base the entire game?

When we write, we must understand how to use pronouns, word endings, nouns, titles, salutations, signatures, modifiers, and names. When using pronouns, you may use “he or she” and “him or her” sparingly. You may change words from singular to plural to avoid sexism (“An individual may check HIS credit records” becomes “Individuals may check THEIR credit records”.) You may repeat nouns (The driver must maintain a safe speed. He must also…” becomes “The driver must maintain a safe speed. The driver must also….”) The writer may use “you” when appropriate (“A client must check with his account manager” becomes “As a client, you are responsible to check with your account manager”.) You may also alternate the use of "he" and "she" when writing a long passage.

Word endings such as –ess and ette create other problems. Other than waitress, actress and hostess, you may omit these endings from most words. For nouns, use person instead of man, as in salesperson. For titles, avoid Mrs. and Miss; use Ms instead. These constitute just some of the forms you can use to be certain that you are not using language that demeans or discriminates. To make sure that you are not using sexist language, look for further instruction in this subject. And, hey guys, keep your eyes open for sexist language!

Keep Subject and Verb Close Together for Easy-to-Understand Sentences

Readers (you) like to find the Subject and Verb in a sentence quickly. The Verb tells you what is happening in the sentence (the action), and the Subject, of course, tells you to whom the action is happening (or who is doing the action). The Subject and Verb, therefore, serve as the two critical elements of any sentence. Naturally, when you have to search for either the Subject or the Verb, the writer has confused you and wasted your time.

Examine this sentence where one of my academic colleagues has done his best to confuse you:

The notion that our company’s critical infrastructures are highly interconnected and mutually dependent in complex ways, both physically and through a host of information and communication technologies (so-called “cyber-based systems”), is more than an abstract, theoretical concept.

Say what? If you can't understand that sentence, don't feel lonely. I couldn't, either, the first time I read it. If you, like me, had to read it again, or said, "duh," the writer has obviously wasted your time, in some feeble effort to impress you. Academic and bureaucratic writers create these kinds of sentences routinely. Believe me. I see them every day.

Are the academics and bureaucrats purposefully trying to deceive us or bugger us? Or, do they simply use bad craft. In this case the academic who wrote the sentence above has simply crafted the sentence poorly. For one thing, it does not have a Character as Subject. What word serves as the Subject of that sentence? “Notion.” That is not what we consider a character. Now, look closely again at the sentence. What word serves as the Verb? “Is”? Yes. Do we call this an Action Verb? Noooooo, the word is called a Being Verb. You may recall we suggested you use Action Verbs whenever possible, especially in business writing. Then, to top things off, the writer has placed the Subject and Verb far, far away from each another.

How many words separate the Subject ("notion") from the Verb ("is") in the example sentence above? 28!! Yep, 28 words separate the Subject from the Verb. If the reader wants to know what is being affirmed (the Verb) about whom (the Subject), the reader (you) will have a helluva time figuring it out. So, what is to be done about this? You'd be best served to scrap the sentence and start over again. Then, you might re-write the sentence in this way:

Our company’s critical infrastructures depend on each other greatly. They are highly interconnected and mutually dependent in complex ways, through a host of information and communication technologies (so-called “cyber-based systems”) and through physical interconnectedness.

You may still not prefer my revised sentence for a variety of reasons; for example, you might say it uses too many multi-syllable words (and it does) and it uses some technical language. Nonetheless, you should be able to grasp its meaning more readily because in the new sentence the Subject “infrastructures” and the Verb “depend” sit next to each other. (I have also changed the sentence to active voice and split it into two sentences.) But, note: when you keep the Subject and Verb close together, readers will have essential information and an essential understanding of the sentence. Therefore, when you write, examine the first few words of all your sentences to look for the Subject and Verb.

Then, you will write better sentences. But, if you want to impress everyone, you can still write crap like this:

Our estimation of the allocation of the necessities of the project variables when attached to our systematized transitional capabilities, especially with integrated management programming, is a heuristic incremental opportunity.

Use action verbs to invigorate your writing!

All writing tells a story! And, stories are driven by action. The villain chased the hero. The hero rescued the fair client. The hero won the contract! For this reason, good writing, especially business writing, prefers action verbs!

We can define action verbs by what they are not! They are not being verbs. The being verbs include: is, am, are, was, were, be, being, and been (or various versions of those forms, such as has been, will be, and is being, among others). When you write for business, when you write to move a reader to action and outcome, avoid those verbs.

Instead, let us prefer, and use, action verbs! Rather than restrict our writing, action verbs free us to use the hundreds of startling and moving words in the English language. We can accomplish a task, satisfy a client, motivate our team, frighten the competition, and change the world!

Yes, we want to use action verbs in our writing, and we must be careful not to turn those beautiful actions into vague and empty ideas. We don’t want to weaken our verbs so that they become the accomplishment of our task, the satisfaction of our customers, the motivation of our team, or the fright of our clients. When we weaken our action verbs by turning them into nouns (nominals), we sap them of their great strength and vitality. We suck the life from them. We, then, write like bureaucrats.

As you think of action verbs and writing, let the newspapers guide you. Newspapers sell stories to their readers, and, in so doing, they use plenty of action verbs, especially in their headlines: Computer technician hits the lottery, DOW gains 500 points, Cognizant wins major contract.

So, the next time you must write an e-mail, a letter, a memo, or a report, tell a story and tell it with action verbs. Then, edit your writing; use characters as subjects and action verbs. Your readers will thank you because they will understand what you are trying to tell them – on the first reading! If they understand your message on the first reading and act on your instructions, you will have saved time and money. You will succeed in your mission. And you employer will reward you!